My husband and I have been married for 13 years. We have enjoyed the process of becoming one and we have endured the challenge of growing our family. Even though Rodney gave me four beautiful gifts in 2005, we have always desired to add children to our family.
Even as I celebrated my 45thbirthday this year, I have not given up on adding little ones to our family of six. At this age some have already made peace with idea of a life without parenting; not me! I still desire to be a Mom. At this point, we’re not considering additional medical interventions. But, we are exploring what adoption looks like for our family.
To that end, we tag teamed two informational sessions with a Bethany Christian Services. Please visit bethany.org for more information. I attended the Foster Care and Foster Care Adoption Session and my husband attended the Infant Adoption Session. Both were held at the same time for interested families here in the Metro Detroit area.
We were able to attend the sessions and share the information we gleaned with each other. While both Foster Parents need to attend the orientation to move any further with this agency, we were able to discern where our interest lies just from these sessions.
This is where my heart cried out and demanded honesty. It was clear to me that being a Foster Parent is a honorable service and full-time ministry and it is not where my heart is.
The goal of Foster Care is reunification of the family and to make them whole. Honestly, I’m not sure I can love freely embracing the child and then lovingly let them go. This is my truth and I am okay with it.
One of the biggest mistakes we can make on this journey is to lie and withhold our truth. Our hearts want what they want and while we may not have the support of family or friends, we cannot lie about our desires.
Can our desires change? Absolutely! Can our hearts expand to embrace something different than what we originally envisioned? Yep! But, will it happen without honesty? Not a chance!
We would be setting ourselves up for failure to pretend our hearts did not yearn for a child we could add to our family on a more permanent basis. Not to mention how well could we freely give to this young person who had experienced the trauma of being removed from their parents if we want to be their permanent parents?
While it is a different means of growing our family, we will be honest about how we feel to receive grace to endure the process and thrive it in. David makes the same request in Psalm 43:3 NKJV Oh, send out Your light and Your truth! Let them lead me; Let them bring me to your holy hill and to your tabernacle.
Our truth before God leads us up to a special place in Him. We will exist on His holy hill and in the peace and joy of His tabernacle. I cannot afford to hide my truth and forfeit this amazing existence and gift.
Join me in owning every part of your hurt and every desire of your heart. The Lord will love us and lead us to the special place He has for us where all these things will work out for our good.
HOPE-Filled Thought: The Lord is a loving Father who desires to hear our hearts and heal our hurts.
Prayer: Thank You Lord that you love us as a father loves his children. Help us to trust that love and to share our hearts with you. We welcome your Spirit to have its way in our lives, to lead us into our divine purpose, and to make us whole. We receive it with joy and it is so. Amen.
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